pursuit of happiness

Quite a good track by Kid Cudi. But quite sad. How long have you been looking for happiness? I’ve been looking for it my entire life. I ran from everything, searching for happiness, thinking it’s somewhere, somehow and I will just reach it with my land. Quite like a Holy Grail but with less religious implications. But after 29 years of search, the geek within says: are u fuckin shitting me? you’ve been torturing me all these years looking for something that does not exist? The optimist within says: you’ll find it, you just have to look into the right place. How the hell do you know what’s the right place??!?!? says the pessimistic. And I come forward and say: leave me alone, guys! I stopped looking for happiness. It’s so hard to find it. I want peace of mind. You just can’t imagine how important it is to feel at ease, to be relax and to see clearly and detached your emotions within. I am not depressed, I am not sad but there are some words, said in a quite weird context, about what you really wish in life. I stopped wishing for happiness. I wish for a more detached attitude and a heart more willing to forgive. I stopped forgiving people the moment I’ve seen them failing around me. Failing to understand the way I cared for them, the trust I invested in them. Is this the right time to let go and embrace my inner self the way it is? I don’t need to play a role, I’ve been an amazing actress only to make some people comfortable although I knew they were some dumb assess. Maybe I embrace so strongly the Christian morale in such a wrong moment of my life: loves the ones around you, forgive and forget. I’ve given my heart to my friends: take it and destroy it! And some of them, damn, they just took that literally, after years and years of staying and sharing our lives. But some of them took that and cherished my gift. And those are the ones I can tell them the way that I truly feel inside.

Do you have what it takes to deserve my heart and my trust,…friend?

ps: don’t need answers, guys, think about your life, it’s rhetorics and it’s a general post, not related to anyone (hold ur horses, you know who)

ps 2: comments are private so you can leave any comment and I won’t publish it